Fourth Child

A while back, I think I mentioned that I should start a series of posts all related to things that are done to or said about Eliot that would never be true if he was the first child or only child. One of those occurred recently.

 I heard Theo say, 'Baby (how Eliot is affectionately referred to at times) do you want to fight?' I turned around and saw Eliot lying there with a pretend sword tucked in his arms. At least the older kids were nice enough to give him some defense weapons!

Uncle Brian Visits

This was the first time in a long time that we have gotten to see Uncle Brian twice in one year. The kids had lots of fun goofing off with him - we hope he did too!

The difference between men and women

The other day I took to decorating our new bathroom a little. During the kids' rest time I put up a new shower curtain, hung a picture, put a new bathmat out, and a new matching hand towel. Nothing major but it definitely looked decorated. Later that day Jack commented that he liked what I had done to the bathroom. I said thanks and then asked him how he knew I had done it. He then said, 'Well I don't for sure, but decorating the bathroom doesn't really seem like something Dad would have done.'

On a related note, tonight right after dinner Addie started 'helping' me by clearing off the table, putting away trivets, etc. All the children had already done the necessary clearing of their own dishes required before being excused. . The boys had retreated to their room to play with soldiers. Addie was free to go too, but her idea of 'playing' was to imitate Mom.

Some things you just don't have to teach....

Out of the mouth of...

Today as we were getting ready for church Theo said, 'Mom let's take these toys for the children.' I then asked who the children were, given that he is only four himself. He very confidently said, 'Addie and Eliot'. Age is relative, I guess.

Moments of Truth

One of the big questions in  parenting is how honest to be and when. Unfortunately, what happened on the way to JC wasn't one of these times. I knew I had to tell the truth. Here is the question from my recently turned seven-year-old:

Jack: Mom, when the speed limit sign says 70, does it mean in the 70s or 70?

Long silence from Mom.

Busted. Busted by my child.

Sweet Moments

Yesterday we went on a very hurried trip to TJ Maxx and Lowes. My mother accompanied us. On the way to the car Jack told me that he had really enjoyed the trip. He was probably the only one - it was a very chaotic trip!  I asked Jack why he enjoyed the trip and he said 'because I got to hold Grandmother's hand during it.'  I am blogging this because it shows Jack's sweet little spirit. He truly is a loving and affectionate little guy.

Editor Note: Mom commented to me that it was funny that Jack stood right by her the whole time holding her hand when he was the one that we were not worried we might lose. The two year old and four year old were running all over the place - not holding anyone's hands!  That might be why it was a chaotic stressful trip as mentioned above.

Oh Grapes!

Family circus moment: Yesterday Theo came to my mom with three large grapes in his hand and said,"My grapes fell in the toilet, but I got them out." Priceless.

Envy of a little brother

Yesterday I was making cookies and let Addie clean one of the beaters. I looked over and saw this:

It was very obvious that Addie knew that she had something special and Eliot was longing for the day he gets the other beater!

I'm a sitter!

Today was a big day for Eliot - he officially sat on his own and his first tooth has broken through. Big steps for a little boy. 

Makeover

I got two very cool chairs from my Grandma. They have been sitting in my parents' downstairs for  a few years now. As we start to organize for the move to our new house, I decided these chairs could do with a makeover so off to work I went.

The cool chairs before the makeover

And three days later, ta da:

So fun!

Jack's Journal

As an effort to get Jack into the discipline of keeping a journal and doing daily writing, we have had him start a journal. We currently give him a topic each day and he is free to form his own thoughts and write them in his own manner. Today I asked him to write about his favourite things from the weekend. Here is a copy of his entry ( I have typed it below because it is a bit blurry):

1. I enjoyed this weekend playing in the park.
2. I enjoyed seeing my family this weekend.
3. I enjoyed getting to remember about grandma and what a great grandma she was.

Four Year Old Funnies

Theo is definitely at that age - the age where I feel I could write almost everything down he said because it would be worth remembering for laughs later. Here are two from today:

On the way to the bathroom store today to look at shower heads (boring to most people especially a six-year-old!) -

Jack: Why do we all have to go to the store?
Charles: Jack, mom and dad are not here for your enjoyment only. We have errands to do today that take priority over going to the park.
Jack: Why couldn't we stay with Grandmother?
Charles: Jack, Grandmother is not going to take you to the park either. She has things to do right now as well. She too is not here just for your enjoyment.
Theo (very quickly and boldly): Yeah Jack. Grandmother is not here for our enjoyment, but Grandad is.


Tonight at Bible time - Jack asks a question that is very interesting but completely off topic.

Charles: Jack, what does this question have to do with Genesis 1?
Jack: Nothing, I was just curious.
Erin: We should have named you George (as in Curious George).
Theo: Yeah, and God should have made you a monkey!

I love four-year-olds.

Happy Mother's Day in October

Over the past weeks, we have been reflecting on some of our favourite things about Charles's mom, Monette. This led us to remember a post Charles wrote for his mom last Mother's Day, and we thought it was worth reposting. Here it is, if you missed it the first time. And if you were fortunate enough to read it the first time, here it is again. We think it is worth a second read (or a third, or fourth...)


This is a guest post from Mr. Foot Down. In the past for American Mother's Day, Mrs. Thumb Up wrote a Top 10 things she's learned from her mom and is grateful for. We thought it would be a nice mother's day gift this year if I did the same for my mom. So here goes (in some rough order but not precise!).


10. My mom has always loved music. She would listen to music all the time and has a wonderful singing voice. I took piano for 6 or 7 years because she thought it was important. My younger siblings have gone on to great heights in performance and composition. I love music now, and it seems so far that my children do too, and that's attributable in no small part to my mom.

9. My mom models sincerity in how she speaks. I still use way too much sarcasm, but by comparison in a UK context, I look incredibly earnest, and I'm sure she's part of that.

8. My mom loves to play games. A few games that I can remember us playing, just off the top of my head: Spades, Hearts, Aggravation, King's Corner, Monopoly, Candyland, Cranium, Geek, Bridge (now my favourite), and the life-saver for those long car trips between Kansas City and Houston, the Alphabet game as we looked for words that started with each letter of the alphabet. Mom was pretty dominant at that game, finding just the right word when she needed it. As I write that, I wonder if perhaps she was putting us on sometimes, but then I go back to #9.

7. My mom is the master at looking for a bargain and saving money. I certainly haven't always agreed with the results of such frugality (not least because I've been too interested in getting the 'name brand' at times), but the example overall has been wonderful.

6. My mom has lived with a significant amount of chronic pain for most of my life, and she just gets on with things. Almost never complaining, you'd never know how bad she feels, unless you ask, or just happen to catch the grimace on her face in an unguarded moment. She's accomplished far more, under far worse circumstances physically, than I could ever imagine to.

5. My mom has taken wonderful care of her parents. My grandparents moved up to Liberty some years ago to be near her and the family, and she's really looked out for them, to the point that my grandma now lives with my parents. What a wonderful example that is to me of honouring your father and mother.

4.5. My mom is one of the smartest people I know, and she (along with my dad) always encouraged us to think and try to learn. If a word was used at the dinner table which we didn't know, we were encouraged to go look it up and learn how to use it. I have no doubt that my own work in a theological college has been shaped significantly by how my mom cultivated that sense of intellectual curiousity and value on the life of the mind.

4. My mom loves the church. She places a really high value on their local church and makes being there every Sunday a priority, even in the midst of physical pain often. That kind of love for God's people is profoundly biblical and a great example.

3. My mom commits herself to love her kids sacrificially. She had me when she was rather young, and of course, we just kept coming. From the beginning she made it her 'job' to raise us and teach us and spend time with us and be a godly, loving parent. When I see so often my own sinful, selfish heart when I'm with my kids, I marvel all the more how my mom has done it.

2. My mom has shown me how to love your spouse and put their needs before your own and be on the same page and support them and build them up. If I could be a fraction of as good a spouse to Mrs. Thumb Up as my mom has been to my dad, I think my wife will be really blessed.

1. My mom loves Jesus. She follows and trusts God, and that faith shapes everything about her life. Before I had ever heard of Abraham Kuyper, I saw a real-life example of his quote about every square inch of existence belonging to Jesus Christ. She has been willing to love and follow Jesus whatever the cost, and that indeed is the greatest gift a parent can give their children.

Thank you so much, Mom, for all these gifts (and so many more!). Happy Mother's Day.

Behind Every Great Man Is A Great Mother

Many times throughout life you are given the opportunity to thank someone. Often these opportunities are quite mundane such as thanking someone for holding the door open or passing the butter. Other times, however, the opportunity to say thank you is much grander, but unfortunately the chance often passes us by, and we don’t take it. It’s the latter type I want to do here – I don’t want to miss the opportunity to thank my mother-in-law for molding my husband into the man he is. 

For the past twelve and a half years I have had the privilege of sharing life with Charles. He is an incredible man and even more amazing husband, but that is not what this writing is about. This entry is about his mom, Monette.  Over the years, it has become obvious to me that many of the things that I so appreciate about Charles he has learned from his mom. Here are a few things that come to mind:

• Charles cares for and makes time for people. I see this same openness in you. Many times I have seen you open your home to someone who has a need.  Countless time I know you have been a listening ear to another homeschooling mom who needs advice.  I wouldn’t even be able to guess how many babies are holding mémés (blankets) that were hand knitted by you. Undeniably, you have been a good friend to many.

• Charles is very accurate in his speech and with details (much to my dismay sometimes!). You and the rest of the family are very precise people. I tried to come up with some examples, but I could only remember them generally, without any of the necessary detail!  Nonetheless, you have been very patient with me and have warmly welcomed me and my ‘less’ precise nature into the family, and I am grateful.

• Charles has often been described as ‘smart’, for a lack of a better word. His ‘smartness’ is largely driven by his inquisitive mind. I know from an early age he would ask questions, and you and David would encourage him to find the answer out for himself – not in a mean way but in a self-sufficient knowledge gaining way. I see this same inquisitive, loving to learn aspect in you as well. Thanks for teaching him to work hard to understand things.

• Charles loves games. It is not hard to see where he learned this. You and David are always ready to play bridge with us, or play a family game of Geek (much to my dissatisfaction!) or Empire.  I know it is not the game that you are so keen on, but instead the opportunity to spend time as a family. I love this and hope we can continue this in our immediate family.  

• Charles has an amazing ability to stay up until early hours in the morning. You are clearly the other night owl in the family. Both of you make me look wimpy with my need for sleep!  I know Charles has always appreciated your ability to stay up late and has enjoyed many late night conversations with you as a result.

• Charles is an excellent dad in many ways, but one way that has particularly ministered to me is his love for newborn babies. I still remember how competent he was with Jack when we first brought him home from the hospital and I was so clueless. Both you and David are so great with babies. He has had excellent role-models in this area and it has paid dividends in our family. I am not sure I know another person who enjoys rocking a baby more than you. It was a joy to have you in England after the births of Jack and Addie, and recently it was incredibly special to watch you rock Eliot during his whole two hour nap (gasp!).

• Charles aims for the gospel to affect every area of our life. This is something I am very grateful for because often my sin tries to push other ways. He is quick to point out that he has learned this from you and David. You all have been excellent examples of living out your faith in the midst of hard situations and even to the extent of sometimes looking foolish in the eyes of the world. This is one of the best gifts you have passed to Charles. We hope our kids can say the same of us some day. 

Monette, there aren’t really words to describe how grateful I am for Charles. It seems overwhelmingly inadequate, but thank you. Thank you for helping to make Charles the man he is today. Jack, Theo, Addie, Eliot, and I are forever indebted to you. Thank you for being my mother-in-law and friend. It is so simple, and I am sorry if I have not said it more clearly before, but thank you.

First time for everything...

About a week ago, Theo came to us and told us he was feeling sick. Charles consoled him and offered him a wastebasket just in case he needed to throw up. Theo perked up with this gesture and excitedly commented, 'Yeah this would be the first time I have thrown up in  America.' It was almost as this made it an event to look forward to!

'The Abbotts'

One of the greatest things about moving back in mid August was the chance to get to know our Abbott cousins better before they move to Pennsylvania. It has been a real treat to watch the kids develop relationships, and then watch relationships turn to friendships. In just two months these little four people have become great friends of ours. The phrase 'The Abbotts' usually followed by 'are coming over' is met with unanimous approval and excitement in our household.

Last night we had supper with them. Josiah prayed a wonderful prayer:

Dear God,
Thank you for today.
Thank you that Jack knows so much about the Revolutionary War and Theo about Lewis and Clark.
Thank you for this food.
Amen

This prayer encapsulates so much in the mind of a seven-year-old. There have been many games of imagination played - wars fought and journeys exploring the West-  in Grandmother's and Granddad's yard these past two months. Josiah is thankful and so are we!

Selfishly we are sad to see them leave today, but we are excited for the ministry God has for them in Pennsylvania. We will hold the memories of these two months close to us as they are far and look forward with great anticipation to the next time we can see them.

Trip to Missouri Capitol

 We had a great day yesterday visiting the Missouri Capitol. We were fortunate enough to get a tour from a new friend (I think that is an appropriate description). Todd, a guy from church, is the chief of staff to a senator there and offered to take us on a little personal tour. By the end of the tour, Jack was holding hands with Todd leading me to think friend is the appropriate description!

Todd took us into the Senate House and let us stand up in the 'pulpit' (not sure the correct term) and throw the gavel down. He explained some of the rules to us, which if broken would prompt the pounding of the gavel. We then instructed Charles to go down and 'break' some of the rules which prompted the kids to pound the gavel at their dad which needless to say they thought was very good fun. 

Todd and Charles then took the big boys up in the rotunda.I went outside and played on the Capitol lawn with Addie and Eliot. The boys thought the journey to the Whispering Gallery (where you can stand on opposite sides of the rotunda and whisper and hear the opposite party) was super cool . Then they ventured to the very top of the rotunda where they got  to go outside.

We ended the day, as all good trips to the Capitol do, with Arris Pizza. We were very happy that Todd joined us as did Grandad, Grandmother, Aunt Natalie, Miriam and Ezra. It was a great day for all. Erin in particular was very thankful for the day and Todd's generosity in leading us because almost daily for the past six weeks, Jack has asked when we will get to go in the Capitol (which is very believable to all who know Jack!) So Momma is happy to check this off the never ending question list!

Picture of Capitol for those less familiar

 

Here we are in the Senate House

 

Picture of the Senate House

 View of the Missouri River from the top

 

Boys at top of the Capitol

Wanted: Lost Bladder

Tonight at dinner we witnessed Jack very maturely wait until the current conversation was finished before starting his own thought - something that doesn't happen that often!  After Charles finished talking, Jack then very articulately but a bit panicky said, 'May I please be excused. I am about to lose my bladder.'

LOL.

Faith of a Child

A conversation as had a couple of nights ago while putting the boys to bed:

Theo (grabbing the kids' bible): Why is Goliath smiling on the front of this cover? [ed note: a question Charles and I have often pondered to ourselves]
Erin: I don't know Theo. That is a good question.
Jack (without hesitation and with much authority): Well, Theo, the Bible says that Goliath stumbled and died. Maybe he decided to love Jesus while he was stumbling.
Theo: I'll have to think about that Jack.
 

Bite-Size Culutural Adjustment

Bringing your four kids 'home' to a country that is familiar to you but not so familiar to them is an interesting ride providing daily entertainment. Here are two snippets from lunch today:

Jack: Mom, who is running for president?
Erin: Well, there are two main candidates. One is Mitt (lots of laughter for what a funny name) Romney and the other is Barack Obama (surprisingly no laughter on that name). [I gave  a bit more background about Republicans and Democrats being the main two parties etc]
Theo: Hey Barack Obama. I have heard of him.
Jack: Yeah, he took David Cameron to a basketball game.
Erin (a bit worried): Is that all you know about him Jack?
Jack: He is president too.
Erin (relieved!): Yes, that is right.

A few minutes later.

Erin: Hey look there is a dog out back, as a BIG (think Labrador size) black and white dog - runs through the back yard.
Theo: Hey, maybe it is a skunk. Mom, is that a skunk?

Two lessons learnt from lunch:
(1) There is little emphasis on learning the US Presidents at an early age in Britain.
(2) Britain doesn't have skunks.

Be Bald

A few days ago at breakfast the boys began to sing the kids praise song that goes 'be bold be strong for the Lord your God is with you.' This prompted Jack to ask Charles what the word bold meant. Charles answered that it was very similar to being courageous. Theo then piped up and said 'yeah, sometimes it means that and other times it means to not have any hair.' I love four-year-olds.

Park Trips

We are relearning how to do parks in America. We are slowly finding our groove. In England you walk to the park. In American you drive to the park. And if it is happy hour (2-4 pm) at Sonic (meaning half price drinks) Mom stops and gets a cherry diet coke for herself and three free waters for the kids. We show up at the park in our mini-van and all get out with our sonic cup and straws. We are starting to fit in very quickly indeed!  We are quick learners!

Yesterday after arriving at the park, Theo quickly started asking others to play with him. His main introduction went something like this:

'Will you play with me? My name is Theo. Do you want to play World War 2? You know World War 2 was real. It really happened. It isn't a fairy tale.'

Unsurprisingly, he didn't have a lot of other four year olds biting at his invitation. Again, unsurprisingly, he had lots of parents laughing at him. And thankfully he had a six year old brother who was ready to indulge his desire to play WW2.

Getting Settled

Saying good-bye to England was hard (blog posts to come when I can emotionally stomach it), but saying hello to many new and exciting things has helped the transition. So many things have happened since we arrived in the USA - it is hard to believe it has only been three weeks. Highlights include:

• getting to see almost all of our family
• buying a new mini van
• lots of playing at the mall (too hot to play outside!)
• First Mizzou football (American football!) pep rally with the grandparents and the Abbotts
• Lots of playing with cousins
• First paediatric appointment with Dr. Holly (whom we are going to LOVE - she gave us her cell phone...just in case we have a need!)
• Jack joining his first soccer team
• Theo getting his first big wheel and driving it lots in Granddad and Grando's driveway
• Addie's speech therapy beginning
• Eliot attending lots of house showings as Mom and Dad try to find the right house for us

We hope to still use this blog as a scrapbook recording fun and important things of our family. Admittedly some of the motivation for the blog (being far from grandparents) is gone, but we have grown to love it as a family scrapbook and hope that many of our friends across the pond will still check in every once in a while. For now, here are some pictures:

Kids with Uncle Brian

Addie with Uncle Brian

Playing at the Mall (over 40 degrees)

Astronaut Theo at the Mall

On your Mark, Get Set, Go - Races in the driveway

Addie on Mom's old bike

Addie chalking in the driveway

Picnic with the Abbott cousins

Cousins - Ages Josiah 7, Jack 6, Esther 5, Theo 4, Miriam 3, Adelaide 2, Ezra 1, (and Eliot sleeping!)

First Mizzou Football Watching Party at J Finneys (a local sports bar)

Goodbye England

Arrival - 2 September 2004 

Departure - 12 August 2012

Ice Lollies

Any time is ice lolly time when you you are defrosting the freezer - 10 am and 60 degrees farenheit!

Olympic Experience

Charles and Jack went to Wembley last night to watch the Olympics semi-final football match. Theo didn't go, but he was happy to dress the part leading up to the departure: 

A day at the Olympics

We were fortunate to get some Olympic tickets. It was a lottery system and the majority of our friends who applied did not get any so we felt really privileged to get tickets to two events: volleyball and football. Charles and I went to the volleyball match today. We watched Japan vs. Dominican Republic in the first match and Russia vs. Algeria in the second match. The first match was fairly close with Japan winning. The second match was completely lop-sided. Russia crushed Algeria. It was close to embarrassing at times. The crowd really got behind Algeria and cheered really loudly whenever they got a point, which really wasn't that often. There were times when I thought my high school volleyball team could have beaten them. But overall, it was a really fun experience. We have never seen London before more efficient or friendly in our time here. Here are some pictures:

The Earls Court Venue:

Ready to go in (the stewards were so friendly they were offering to take people's pictures!): 

Pretty high up but still in the arena so we were happy:

Eliot was a star. At one point we laid him on the ground on a blanket and he had a fun little kick about. We got a couple of funny looks, but mostly smiles from those around us. We wondered if we looked negligent or laid back, thoughts?

A close up of Eliot which is both cute (with the smile) and kind of scary (with the red eyes!). 

All in all, it was a great day. A big thanks to Charis for watching the older three kids. We will do the same for her next week as she and Seulgi have the same tickets for next Monday. There was part of us who felt bad for not taking the older kids, but we are confident they were more excited about going for a long playdate at the Byuns than they would have watching the volleyball. :)

Happy Birthday Theo!

Today we had the privilege of celebrating Theo's fourth birthday. We went to Bekonscot Model Village as a family and allowed Theo to bring one friend with him. He chose his good friend Josiah. It was a really fun day with viewing the village, playing on the fun playground, having a picnic, and riding a little train. A fun fact about this village was that the Queen celebrated her tenth birthday there. Theo liked that fact.

 We then ended the day as a family with our traditional pizza celebration at Pizza Hut. While at Pizza Hut we made a list of things that Theo had learned in the last twelve months or had accomplished. We came up with the following:

•  to count to thirty
• to recognize his name
• to dress himself
• to put his shoes on
• graduated from St. Paul's Pre-School
• to ride a bike with stabilizers 
• to be a good big brother to Eliot 

 We then decided that we should all go around the table and say what we appreiated most about Theo. Here are the results:

•  Charles: His imaginative play and how he creates so many fun things to play 
• Erin: How he has made progress on working hard and doesn't quit when things are hard 
• Addie: How he colours (there were crayons in front of her so it may have just been the power of suggestion as Theo is not a big colourer) 
• Eliot (as spoken by Mom): How he talks to me after breakfast every morning and makes me smile
• Jack: How he lies on my bed with me and reads books 

 We are very blessed by this little boy and thank God he is part of our family.

 Kids the morning of Theo's birthday:

Theo on his birthday:

Theo receiving Miles Axelrod his present from Jack, Addie, and Eliot:

Picture of model village:

Having fun in the phone booth:

On the train at the model village:

Theo and his friend Josiah:

Theo blowing out his candles:

Family at Pizza Hut:

Last Outing in Cambridge

Last Saturday we went to Cambridge to say good-bye to our old home and some great friends. We had fantastic weather which has not at all been guaranteed this summer. We met the Tuckwells at Lammas Land had a picnic, jumped in the paddling pool, and even managed one last Anderson Boys vs Tuckwell Boys (dads included) Football Match. They won, but with the addition of Eliot to our family we think we will have a chance in a few years when our boys outnumber theirs!

In the late afternoon we headed over to city centre and enjoyed one last walk through the beautiful streets. I have so many memories pushing Jack through those streets six years ago as a new mom/mum. It wasn't nearly as peaceful this Saturday with seven kids in tow, but it was just as beautiful - a beautiful mess!  

The mess was manifested when we grabbed ice creams and enjoyed them in St. John's College gardens while we watched punters go by. We had numerous people take our picture sitting there - we must have been a sight - seven kids with ice cream dripping down all body parts. Well, to be accurate, our kids were messy, but the Tuckwell kids in true Tuckwell fashion were as tidy as could be!  

Progression of trying to get our kids to all smile at the camera:

On our way back to the car, we had one last unplanned sight to see and that was a rather intoxicated man bridge jumping. This involves climbing out of your punt onto the bridge you are getting ready to cross under, over the bridge, and then jumping back into your boat as it comes back on the other side. As Charles keeps pointing out we don't know for certain that this man was drunk, but I am fairly confident that you would not do this sober. It was entertaining and a good example to Jack of what 'drunk' means since he had recently asked about this when reading the Bible. 

All in all, it was a fabulous day. But even more important, it was a fabulous three years in Cambridge. Part of our heart will always be there because of how many rich memories we have - primarily of becoming parents.; but also of arriving and experiencing deep loneliness and then watching God surprise us beyond our imagination with friends that are just so very special and dear to us - friends that have truly become like family. 

As I watched the kids exchange hugs in the car park, not really understanding how long 'you will not see these people for a long time' really means, tears welled up in my eyes. Good tears. Something wouldn't be right if we had lived in a country eight years and were not sad to leave it. And so to the Tuckwells, and many others, we say thank you for being part of our England. You have made it what it is to us.

PS - And yes, Eliot did enjoy the day - he just didn't make it in many of the pictures!